Business owners and employees are being betrayed. Unless rapid action is taken, they face the risk of massive losses. This betrayal is sabotaging their careers, businesses, health and relationships. Could you be the next victim? The unfortunate truth is … you already are.
Everyone believes it will never happen to them. But those are usually the people who will be hurt the most. You are being betrayed at your workplace, and in your home.
This ongoing erosion of trust is costing you time and money every single day. Unless something changes, this betrayal will also cost you your relationships, health and reputation.
You won’t spot the warning signs until it’s too late. And a sad truth is that a large number of professionals go to their graves without ever realising just how deep the betrayal ran.
But who would do such a shallow and damaging thing to you?
You probably have someone in mind right now. No, it’s not them. At least, not this time.
The person who is betraying you … is you.
The confession
How are you betraying yourself?
The answer is simple: You’re pretending to be someone you’re not. Before you start getting too triggered and run to BOP Business News towers to burn effigies of me, please allow me to make a confession:
I was the ultimate artist of self-betrayal. I created a highly successful career advising the leaders of the biggest brands on the planet … but that success was built on the back of a lie.
No laws were broken, obviously. Unless you count the universal laws of authenticity. However, I was betraying myself, and those around me, because I was trying to be someone I wasn’t.
Like an actor in a corporate pantomime, I dressed, spoke, behaved and even thought the way my ‘character’ was supposed to be.
Did it work? Sure. Did it make me successful? Too right. Did it make me money? Absolutely.
It would be so perfect, had it not been for the fact I was betraying myself. I was being the exact opposite of the person – and the leader – I wanted to be.
Holding up the mirror
No matter how professional or ‘together’ we try to appear, our thoughts and actions betray us.
As the sayings go…
Never trust a skinny chef.
Never trust a broke accountant.
Never trust an obese personal trainer.
Never trust a lawyer released from prison.
Your actions and behaviours are like a walking billboard, showing the world what you think about yourself.
More often than not, these behaviours are sabotaging your goals and your talent.
You tell the world: “I pride myself on being a good communicator” … but you won’t say, “No”.
“It’s important to take decisive action” … but you won’t back yourself to make a big decision.
“Family comes first” … but you spend the evening with your phone, not your children.
“I really want to love myself” … but you never invest in yourself.
“I’m an inspirational leader” … but you let the people distract you from the problem.
“It’s not about the money” … but it’s the money that gets you out of bed.
When your behaviours are not in alignment with your vision and values, you make less money, have less fun and enjoy less connection and fulfilment.
So why do you do it?
Love the way you lie
We choose to let our actions betray our values because we fear the risk of shame that comes with being our authentic selves. Plus, we prefer to live in comfort and take the ‘easy’ option, even if it isn’t aligned to our personal values and philosophies.
Why stay true and stand out when it’s easier to follow a lie and blend in?
There’s no point in torturing yourself with a goal you’re not achieving if your behaviours are not congruent with your desires.
It’s like when I used to tell the world I’d be an athlete with a Guinness World Record to his name… but I was living on a Marlboro and vodka-based diet.
I told my clients to trust me, but I couldn’t even trust myself around an unattended birthday cake in the office kitchen.
My goals didn’t happen until I changed my behaviours.
Staying true to yourself
Self-betrayal happens when you do things the wrong way round. You tell yourself you’ll start to be that bold, confident, outgoing, trustworthy, disciplined version of yourself once you achieve that next level of professional success.
But the opposite is true. You only achieve the professional success (and the personal success, for that matter), after you become that version of yourself.
To stop betraying yourself and start living in line with your personal values and philosophies, understand that success is the outcome of change, not the catalyst.
So change trajectory: start acting in alignment with who you want to be. Look at your career, business, family, finances, health and fitness.
Ask yourself: “Are my thoughts, actions and behaviours aligned with the outcome I want?”
Stop living in delusion.
Start making a difference.
It’s time to be who you always said you were going to be.
